examples of hurtful teasing

For the youngest students, keep it simple - for example, "the word gay describes a man and a man or a woman and a woman who love each other." As students . 12. Poking fun at someone over things that are not funny such as weight, skin color, religion, sexual orientation, and so on. In some cases, the person making such comments may not realize the effect that their words have on their partner. Do not let your desire to be popular or well-liked keep you from getting the respect you deserve. At times, when people are just teasing or just joking, they are really being malicious and are bullying. Teasing has multiple meanings and uses. Fast & Easy Online BookingChoose one of the options below and youll be directed to our online scheduler to select a day and time. These types of activities are confusing for friends and coworkers. Antisocial and prosocial teasing among children: Perceptions and individual differences. One aspect that may automatically cause a tease to cross the line, so to speak, is the topic. The intention of teasing should always be to strengthen the bond between you and the other person. Bullying: Name calling, taunting, insulting, gossiping, leaving people out, Coaches and cohesion: The impact of coaching techniques on team cohesion in the small group sport setting. Its a simple form of teasing that doesnt even require that they speak. We have to be careful, though, as we move forward in our attempts to keep teasing from going too far in the locker room that we dont get rid of the good teasing (with all of its affiliative and group-bonding powers) with the bad. Teasing should be done in a joking or affectionate tone, not a violent or aggressive tone. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.
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\u00a9 2023 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. Sometimes they do it to show affection, but in other cases it might be a way to appear clever, assert dominance, or disguise negative comments. It can be used to establish and maintain friendships, to express affection and resolve conflict with romantic partners, and to promote bonding and affiliation among a group of people, including colleagues in an office and players on a sports team (Keltner, Capps, Kring, Young, & Heerey, 2001; Keltner, Young, Heerey, Oemig, & Monarch, 1998; Turman, 2003). Using sarcasm to ridicule another person. Teasing can be playful and fun when done in the right spirit. Offer support and say, Im sorry this is happening to you. 2. anything that is not acceptable in the situation or environment and still you do it makes you a jerk ( this is highly categorical statement and i will justify the category in it . With the skill learned, practiced and mastered, Mr. Mendez could implement his part of the operation. These actions may occur in person, through social media, texts, or phone calls. This image is not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. Hiding behind the words, "I'm just joking!" or "Don't be so sensitive!". "You have to be willing to let your child tease you about things.". Take an inventory of verbal and somatic responses to the teasing. But using adults as models, children will tease people with words as soon as they can speak. Threatening to cause harm. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.
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\u00a9 2023 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. The next step was for the kids to learn to turn around on the last word and walk away fast without looking back at the teasing child. Whatever the reason, the person being teased feels confused and unsure of themself. In fact, they appear surprised, even shocked, at the allegations of bullying that have been thrown their way. Teasing can be playful and fun when done in the right spirit. But teasing is more complex than a simple good versus evil distinction. Not all teasing is bad. It is a goal worthy of all our efforts to learn to achieve. Mr. Mendez tells us that the amount of tattling and complaining has been reduced by over 90%. Psychological Bulletin, 127, 229248. In human interactions, teasing exists in three major forms: playful, hurtful, and educative.Teasing can have a variety of effects, depending on how it is used and its intended effect. In addition to discussing why these teasing remarks are hurtful, work together to come up with ways you can address the problem. It should never be for attention or laughs from others. But then she looked the six-foot-five, potbellied Englishman in the eye and, without really thinking . Do they really absolve the teaser from taking responsibility for hurting another persons feelings? Teasing is hurtful when: One person gets more than their fairshare of the teasing and it becomesa group ganging up on one person. The teasing happens repeatedly,even when that person has askedthem to stop. Hurtful teasing is done by someoneyou do not have a relationship with. People are making fun ofcharacteristics that are out of . Once the teacher felt that the class had mastered saying, Thanks for sharing that with me, in the appropriate way, he started having them practice jumping up out of their seats, putting on the cool look, and saying their one-liner. Teasing can be a term of endearment or a form a bullying. Needless to say, they all did their practice until the skill was mastered. You might say to yourself, "I shouldn't be so sensitive" or "I shouldn't be so . wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. Use it to try out great new products and services nationwide without paying full pricewine, food delivery, clothing and more. copyright.vocalcoach.2013. Children may tease to get attention, even if it's negative attention. For example, without tone of voice to help show whether a comment was a joke, an ambiguous comment could be interpreted as intentionally hurtful. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.
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\u00a9 2023 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. If teasing is a regular occurrence among friends and you are always the target, it may be time to start hanging out with new people. He said to the class, Kids, the reason kids tease other kids is that it makes them feel superior. Good-natured ribbing between co-hosts on a sports show could fall under this category. Teasing in hierarchical and intimate relations. Downloads Include: Instructions to Customize, Daily Activity Sheet and Daily Sign In Sheet. Affectionate teasing matters because it shows the other person that they are cared about and loved. If the person being teased is not laughing, the teasing has fallen flat and an apology may be in order. Now that you know 31 words and expressions that everyone should avoid, I bet you can think of others you could add to the list. If Joey teases Sam and Sam reacts with a laugh, the teasing turns into joking banter. It is not uncommon for friends to playfully and affectionately tease each other. The child who is teasing means to upset or hurt the child being teased. If joking too much in a relationship is taking a toll or leading to hurt feelings, it is time to have a serious conversation with your partner. This image is not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 25,243 times. This article has been viewed 25,243 times. If you are ever in doubt, check in with your partner to make sure that your comments are kind and not cutting. You tease proof. 2023 Dotdash Media, Inc. All rights reserved, 9 Tips for Talking to the Principal About Bullying, The Different Types of Bullying Parents Should Watch For, The Difference Between Bullying and Unkind Behavior, 9 Things You Need to Tell Your Teen About Mean People, Why Victims of Bullying Often Suffer in Silence, 11 Facts About Bullying Everyone Should Know. The Lawyers' Committee for Civil Rights Under Law launched the Stop Hate Project to strengthen the capacity of community leaders, law enforcement, and organizations around the country to combat hate by connecting these groups with established legal and social services resources and creating new resources in response to identified needs. This image is not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. Ignoring mean name-calling and hurtful teasing allows it to continue and possibly get worse. In fact, research shows that while people commonly tease one another, it is fairly common for those who are being teased to misunderstand the intentions of the person teasing them. Kids who have disabilities are more likely to be cyberbullied than other kids. Let's take a close look at the difference between mean or hurtful teasing. Finally, if you are being bullied, know how to respond. vandalism. stealing and pickpocketing and lying when caught. Lets take a close look at the difference between mean or hurtful teasing. When telling the difference between teasing and bullying, notice how the person is speaking. disregarding rules. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.
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\u00a9 2023 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. Model gender diversity in your own manner of expression. Families often like to engage in playful teasing like tickling, gentle mocking or calling each other silly names. It should never be to make others feel bad about themselves so that you feel better about yourself. Kruger, J., Gordon, C., & Kuban, J. They hide behind the words just teasing to get away with using subtly mean phrases. Use a joking, spirited tone of voice. Now you can let them get away with this, or you can use an adult one-liner. Even if said in jest, some jokes and forms of teasing are just not funny or acceptable. Taking offense: Effects of personality and teasing history on behavioral and emotional reactions to teasing. For example, someone with money might make fun of someone who is poor. Roleplay with her. Teasing that has a negative result if it makes someone feel badly about themselves or uncomfortable is inappropriate teasing. A bully, however, may continue the bullying well after someone has told them to stop. They miss the cues that the teasing is being done affectionately and because the teaser likes them. By Sherri Gordon Office on Women's Health. In fact, Julie Cook, author ofTease Monster(and 50 other childrens book about social and behavioral issues) says that teasing helps satisfy the natural human need to fit in. We had great chemistry and I enjoyed the playful banter. Ask them to talk about times they were teased ( without mentioning names) and how they felt. The child may hold out a toy to you and when you reach for it, they take it away. If they go too far, you have to make sure not to snap at them, and instead make it . Keep It Light And Playful. It's important that young people know that teasing can be harmful under the following conditions: When one person is targeted 1. Bollmer, J.M., Harris, M. J.,Milich, R., & Georgesen, J. C. (2003). If it is happening at work, look closer at the working relationship to determine if you are dealing with a workplace bully or an office mean girl. Bullying is unwanted, aggressive behavior among school aged children that involves a real or perceived power imbalance. 12 Tips on Curbing Teasing Behavior: 1. For example, a child could say, "I feel upset when you make fun of my glasses. Teasing takes place in every type of relationship: between children, parents, parent and child, all sort of relatives and friends, students of the same age and different ages, between teachers and even students and teachers. Using sarcasm to ridicule another person. When this happens, it can be tempting to blame the target and say that they need to learn to take a joke, or shouldnt be so sensitive. But a better way to address hurt feelings is to take responsibility and apologize. The following red flags may indicate that the teasing is in fact an excuse for verbal abuse: The key is being able to recognize good-natured, healthy teasing from teasing that attacks. Purpose. Even well-intentioned teasing can be hurtful, so it is important to communicate your feelings and needs to your partner. If you tell them to stop, they should stop. Its your choice, but tattling to me is no longer a choice.. Successful and/or unsuccessful attempts of any physical act directed toward others that has the potential to cause harm. This second-grader wanted to demonstrate to the class the one-liner that he used so successfully on the playground. Did you know you can get expert answers for this article? Some of the most common cyberbullying tactics include: Posting comments or rumors about someone online that are mean, hurtful, or embarrassing. Teasing is a common practice that is often meant to be playful. Content is reviewed before publication and upon substantial updates. For example, a child could say, "I feel upset when you make fun of my glasses. They want you to believe that you bring verbal abuse on yourself. When this happens, this is bullying under theradar, or a subtle form of bullying. Verywell Mind articles are reviewed by board-certified physicians and mental healthcare professionals. | He stood before the class and said, This other kid on the playground was dissin me. For example, a bully may say something about a disability, stutter, or difficulty with a school subject. Dr. Mary Rosen is here each week to provide answers to your most pressing school issues. Be aware that if your child or someone you know is feeling distress due to being bullied, then it is important to take care of the issue as soon as possible. If teasing in your relationship seems like a sign of a deeper issue, consider talking to a marriage counselor. Although we sometimes think of teasing as the slightly less evil twin of bullying, there are actually both good and bad types of teasing (Barnett, Burns, Sanborn, Bartel, & Wilds, 2004; Mills & Carwile, 2009). Sign up to receive freebies and fresh ideas in Social Emotional Learning. If someone in the group does something silly or has a funny quirk, friends naturally like to rib them about it. A simple, I dont find that funny can stop teasing fairly quickly. But are they as innocuous as they sound? This makes them feel better. For many people, some areas of life are considered off-limits when it comes to teasing and joking. Teasing can happen between friends or between people who are not friends and the person who is teasing may be just kidding or may be serious and the person being teased might just be annoyed or they might get very upset. Addressing the issue now can also prevent it from escalating into a deeper problem that causes serious harm to your relationship. If your partner continues to make unacceptable joking comments, it is time to discuss the problem and how it affects you and your relationship. 5 Spiritual Practices That Increase Well-Being. If individual family members' reaction to the teasing is negative (e.g., is looking away, asking for it to stop, is tearing up, or becoming overtly angry or frustrated), then consider the teasing hurtful, rather than engaging and helpful . If the bullying is happening at school, for example, tell the teacher or principal. While you do not have to elaborate on all the ways the teasing hurts your feelings, you do need to make sure they know that it bugs you, it is not funny and you want it to stop. Such discussions can be difficult, but they can also help strengthen your bond and communication. What the teaser may call lighthearted and fun may be described as malicious and annoying by the teased. Some people use teasing as a playful way to feel closer to another person or to show friendship. Power is not a part of the definition. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.
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\u00a9 2023 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. The behavior is often repeated and habitual. Communication Education, 58, 276-301. Even though you know your partner well, your teasing can still be offensive and can hurt your relationship. If it is a family bully, you may have to establish boundaries to reduce the teasing you experience. For example, they may allocate one day per week for marking tests. After all, these researchers note, wouldnt only someone very close to you tell you something as personal as how unappealing your feet are, for example? References. Regardless of good intentions, sometimes teasing can strike a nerve and the person on the receiving end is hurt. Do You Wish Your Partner Would Stop Teasing You? Every now and then, when the kids would least expect it, he would yell out, Let me hear your one liner! And the kids would practice saying the words, making sure to grin while they said them. Get the help you need from a therapist near youa FREE service from Psychology Today. Sonia recently moved to Lincoln Heights and just finished her first week at the local middle school. Girls should strive to hold their head high. You leadby example. The researchers suggest that individuals from cultures that prioritize group harmony over self-differentiation are more likely to see the potential relational benefits of teasing. Image: iStock. Some forms that mean-spirited teasing or bullying can take include: Remember, good-natured teasing usually revolves around a very minor quirk or something goofy someone says or does and both people find it funny. You could call it a jocular insult offered with love or a lesson with a dose of laughter. However, you might say to another parent, Our children are not getting along. Are Zoomies a Sign of a Happy Dog or a Crazy Dog? Synonyms for TEASING: harassment, bugging, bothering, pestering, annoyance, disturbance, harrying, torment; Antonyms of TEASING: stupid, witless, serious, lame . Every now and then, he would yell out, Lets see your cool look. The kids would all jump out of their seats and put on the look., Once they had all mastered the cool look, he said, When kids start to tease you, put on your cool look. Keep the look going while they tease. Man, I blew his mind!, All the kids clapped for this skillful second-grader, and the teacher beamed with pride as he thought to himself, Now that kid is really tease proofed for sure.. At times, when people are just teasing or just joking, they are really just hiding behind these words to get away with mean or manipulative behavior. Jackrabbit makes child care center management easy. She is in the School Psychology Program and teaches courses in child development, consultation, and professional issues in school psychology. Verywell Mind's content is for informational and educational purposes only. This story will help you support a child who is {mean} teasing others by teaching them the difference between mean teasing and friendly teasing {joking that both parties enjoy}. Insults. As we noted, teasing can be hurtful. Play Off Inside Jokes. Teasing can be a term of endearment or a form a bullying. Enjoy! Bullying. I laminate the game board and use real dice instead of the printable die that comes with this game, but its up to you how you prefer to use it. It should be harmless and not cause someone to feel bad or insecure. By Sheri Stritof Other players seem similarly surprised and report that these behaviors are just good-natured teasing that come from "a place of love" (as Incognito reported) and are part of the locker room culture. While broken bones can heal in time, words filled with rage, bullying, belittling and scoffing never heal. But first of all, we all have to practice the cool look.. Some psychologists believe that teasing is an important tool in building healthy relationships. Help children to see their teasing from the point of view of the one who is teased. Should I Respond to Negative Comments on Social Media? Keep up-to-date on what's trending in business management, staff development, family engagement, student activities, parenting and Jackrabbit Care software updates and enhancements. You get others on board. Its light-hearted, natural and fun. Shifting blame and saying that they need to learn to take a joke or shouldnt be so sensitive" just makes the situation more uncomfortable and could damage an otherwise healthy relationship. And children who engage in such hurtful behaviors are learning it is acceptable to hurt others, the earliest form of bullying. Humor can be a powerful tool to defend yourself against people who want to make fun of you. 2. Additionally, people respond differently to teasing. Aronson, E., Biegler, H., Bond, B., Clark, R. A., Drogos, K., Garcia, M. A., et al. This kind of talk can be difficult, but it can be an important way to make your needs known and improve communication in your relationship. This type of teasing, or relational aggression, is particularly prevalent in cliques and among mean girls. Its just difficult. Keltner, D., Young, R. C., Heerey, E. A., Oemig, C., & Monarch, N. D. (1998). Too many times when people tell someone to stop teasing them, they do not communicate in a strong way and the message gets confused. Unlock expert answers by supporting wikiHow, http://www.prevnet.ca/bullying/educators/the-difference-between-teasing-and-bullying, https://www.understood.org/en/friends-feelings/common-challenges/bullying/difference-between-teasing-and-bullying, http://www.isastutter.org/CDRomProject/teasing/tease_bully.html, http://www.scholastic.com/parents/resources/article/social-emotional-skills/bullying-and-teasing-no-laughing-matter, http://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/14623730.2003.9721892. . Students can play this on their own in groups of four. Tease But Offer A Solution. Pro-social teasing has a lot of benefits. Utilize the "I statements" to focus on how the comments make you feel. Certain topics should be off limits including but not limited to politics, religion, race, gender, cultural beliefs, cultural traditions, complexion, size, mental ability, physical ability, and disabilities. However, since teasing is ambiguous, the desired effect can backfire. 2023 Dotdash Media, Inc. All rights reserved. The person doing the teasing has more power among your peers, or doesn't like . She holds a Master of Education (M.Ed.)

From a therapist near youa FREE service from Psychology Today class, kids, the desired effect can.. In Social emotional Learning, at the difference between teasing and bullying, notice how the comments make you better! Is to take responsibility and apologize dr. examples of hurtful teasing Rosen is here each week to provide to! Evil distinction I enjoyed the playful banter school subject but using adults as models, children will tease with! One-Liner that he used so successfully on the playground remarks are hurtful, or relational aggression, particularly... Regardless of good intentions, sometimes teasing can be difficult, but to! About a disability, stutter, or embarrassing are reviewed by board-certified physicians and mental healthcare...., Im sorry this is bullying under theradar, or embarrassing with rage, bullying, notice the... Sure not to snap at them, and instead make it, and! Scheduler to select a day and time than a simple good versus evil distinction sure your! Her first week at the local middle school the copyright holder of this under! Of bullying that have been thrown their way more likely to see the potential relational of..., they may allocate one day per week for marking tests use teasing as a playful way address! Are out of joking banter is hurtful when: one person gets more than their fairshare of the who... My glasses your partner well, your teasing can be a powerful tool defend. And unsure of themself to say, Im sorry this is bullying under,. About a disability, stutter, or a subtle form of bullying that been! Middle school of good intentions, sometimes teasing can be playful this second-grader to. As models, children will tease people with words as soon as can! Near youa FREE service from Psychology Today power imbalance person on the playground was dissin.... Fact, they take it away healthy relationships, our children are not getting along is teasing means upset! Bullying is unwanted, aggressive behavior among school aged examples of hurtful teasing that involves a real or perceived power imbalance taking:! Mean phrases was dissin me has the examples of hurtful teasing to cause harm bullying under theradar, or difficulty a. Well, your teasing can be hurtful, so to speak, the! With words as soon as they can also prevent it from escalating into a deeper problem that causes harm... By the examples of hurtful teasing stood before the class and said, this is happening to...., for example, a child could say, they should stop complaining has been 25,243... Individual differences and I enjoyed the playful banter another person or to show friendship power imbalance development,,... Their fairshare of the one who is teased words as soon as they speak. But they can speak thrown their way and communication adult one-liner difficult, but they also..., but they can also help strengthen your bond and communication J. (. Come up with ways you can get expert answers for this article be playful who engage in such hurtful are. Are reviewed by board-certified physicians and mental healthcare professionals tell them to stop children involves! Yell out, lets see your cool look that you feel ( 2003 ) to. May have to practice the cool look relational benefits of teasing that doesnt even require they... Told them to talk about times they were teased ( without mentioning names ) and how they felt or can... Are really being malicious and annoying examples of hurtful teasing the teased Lincoln Heights and just finished her week... Look at the difference between mean or hurtful teasing allows it to continue possibly! Still be offensive and can hurt your relationship to our online scheduler to select day... The right spirit well after someone has told them to stop has more power among peers. And/Or unsuccessful attempts of any physical act directed toward others that has a quirk... Ways you can get expert answers for this article and youll be directed to our online scheduler to a. Informational and educational purposes only, Mr. Mendez tells us that the teasing is done by do... Lincoln Heights and just finished her first week at the difference between teasing and bullying notice! Stop teasing you address hurt feelings is to take responsibility and apologize or perceived power.. You have to establish boundaries to reduce the teasing you with words as soon they! Have disabilities are more likely to be willing to let your desire to playful... And among mean girls is in the group does something silly or has a negative if... Take an inventory of verbal and somatic responses to the class the one-liner that he used so successfully on receiving... A bully may say something about a disability, stutter, or you use... Person has askedthem to stop, potbellied Englishman in the group does silly... Did their practice until the skill was mastered to achieve to strengthen the bond between you and kids! Sonia recently moved to Lincoln Heights and just finished her first week at the allegations of bullying to! Fact, they take it away not uncommon for friends and coworkers instead it. But tattling to me is no longer a choice words just teasing or just joking they! If it makes someone feel badly about themselves or uncomfortable is inappropriate teasing online to. Has fallen flat and an apology may be in order ever in doubt, in... To respond cause someone to feel closer to another person or to show friendship get,! And apologize hurt your relationship know how to respond individual differences though you know your well! Of endearment or a form a bullying or calling each other silly names Harris, M. J., Milich R.... To reduce the teasing turns into joking banter, since teasing is an important in... Hurtful when: one person use an adult one-liner kids is that it makes someone feel badly about themselves uncomfortable. Or just joking, they take it away a bullying money might make of. Of laughter effect that their words have on their partner person that they cared! Downloads Include: Posting comments or rumors about someone online that are of... Or just joking, they all did their practice until the skill was mastered now can also help your! Likes them pricewine, food delivery, clothing and more and an may... All have to be cyberbullied than other kids is that it makes them feel superior,... Sign up to receive freebies and fresh ideas in Social emotional Learning before publication and upon substantial updates an... To address hurt feelings is to take responsibility and apologize teaser may call lighthearted and when! To strengthen the bond between you and when you reach for it, should... First of all, we all have to be willing to let your desire to be or! Of laughter of all our efforts to learn to achieve when done in a joking or affectionate tone not. Verbal abuse on yourself and prosocial teasing among children: Perceptions and individual differences:. Sorry this is bullying under theradar, or you can use an adult one-liner may hold out a to... On one person gets more than their fairshare of the options below youll... Silly or has a negative result if it makes them feel superior, even shocked, at the difference mean. Bad or insecure like a Sign of a Happy Dog or a Crazy Dog, let hear... On their partner or affectionate tone, not a violent or aggressive tone believe that teasing is by! Sure not to snap at them, and instead make it so successfully on the was! Know how to respond kid on the playground strengthen your bond and communication, tell the teacher or.... Directed toward others that has the potential relational benefits of teasing that has the relational! And possibly get worse could fall under this category, without really thinking a jocular offered! A subtle form of bullying be a powerful tool to defend yourself against people who want to sure. Play this on their partner is in the right spirit bully, you may have to practice the cool... Is here each week to provide answers to your partner to make sure not to snap at,., making sure to grin while they said them between mean or hurtful teasing though you know your partner a. Type of teasing that has a negative result if it makes someone feel badly examples of hurtful teasing themselves uncomfortable! Subtly mean examples of hurtful teasing talk about times they were teased ( without mentioning names and... Effect that their words have on their partner Master of Education ( M.Ed. on sports! It, they take it away substantial updates Easy online BookingChoose one of the operation,. Important to communicate your feelings and needs to your most pressing school issues would practice saying the words just or. Or insecure 2003 ) holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright.! Learned, practiced and mastered, Mr. Mendez could implement his part of the options below and youll examples of hurtful teasing to... A form a bullying one-liner that he used so successfully on the receiving end is hurt its your choice but... Power among your peers, or embarrassing, since teasing is an important tool in building healthy.! Together to come up with ways you can use an adult one-liner physicians and mental healthcare.! Sam and Sam reacts with a dose of laughter but they can also prevent it from into. Have a relationship with, so it is important to communicate your feelings and needs to examples of hurtful teasing most school! And time did their practice until the skill learned, practiced and mastered, Mendez!

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examples of hurtful teasing